I realised this week that I love you but I can’t decipher how should I tell you that. The last time we conversed, you tried to make me confess my love for you but I really thought that I liked you so much because of the intense spiritual connection that we share.
Music keeps my body and life moving. I lose count of the number of rounds I take and hardly take notice if I am feeling cold or tired when I keep singing while I am walking in rounds.
I can not express right now
how much am I attracted to your mind.
I am trying to keep away from you anyhow
to avoid having deeper feelings of such kind.
I am missing my ex right now all of a sudden. Why? I don’t know. This is happening for the third time since we separated and every time this emotion manages to make me anxious and my feelings wheel as if in a whirlwind. Today, I even surfed his name and then, as always, that feeling of the regret of surfing him grew on me.
I am numb right now. I fantasised hundred times of hundred things about you and our first meet but all this was unexpected. Maybe, that is why, right now I am not able to comprehend what I feel towards you now when I have finally met you or even whether I do.
I am in a fright towards who I was in the past. Everyone and everything could affect me. I used to cry silently. I was bullied and laughed at by all the people of my age in the primary and secondary classes without any fault of mine. This experience transformed me into a premature person. Hence, now I can also connect, reciprocate and communicate with the ones who understand the patterns of life.
Forget and forgive
yourself for all of your errors.
Take a breath of relief.
Ward off all of your terror.
O heart! keep your anxieties abate
good things come to those who wait.
Throw away all the worries and hate
and hold on for what the future will await.
It aches to stay away from you. You are still a thought, but now with an essence. It aches to think that I will not think of you. It aches to wipe off all the possibilities from my mind— the fights, the resolutions, all the hugs and warmth—everything. It aches to believe that you will always remain just a thought.
“It’s over. Why can’t you understand? I don’t love you anymore. Stop bothering me and go away. Leave.” He shouted at the extremes of his lungs.