The words that you said keep echoing in my mind.

I keep understanding some of their relevance over time

Which you said when my brain was not in the capacity to comprehend them

Or that I was not ready to accept them as and when they happened.

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They cheat, you are hurt. They apologize but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. It hurts because it breaks and when something breaks, it hurts. It hurts because you have to detach a part of you and maybe, bid it a final goodbye. A part of you dies but the remaining survives. When someone tries to, intentionally or unintentionally, reignite that dead passion, it hurts because as Amy Denver told Sethe, ‘Anything dead coming back to life hurts.’

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I Have to Hate You

For all the lies and disguises you served to me, for sharing my right as a partner with someone who didn’t treat you as a human, for treating me as a toy to please yourself, for me to survive and prevent my damaged heart from shattering into pieces yet again, from breaking my already punchered trust on humanity altogether, for making my heart cry, for me to survive until I achieve all of my life goals, I have to hate you.

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