Thoughts keep changing according to experiences. Sometimes, I write to make me believe in my changing thought process, more like an aid in the transition and to remind myself that humans are diverse just as these experiences and we must keep learning and changing wherever necessary for our growth and our survival at times. Transformation is tough because the acceptance that the old patterns need to be let go is not an easy one because letting go is followed by uncertainty and then, we need step out of our comfort zone which is definitely not easy at all.
Sometimes, stepping into the unknown can be very scary yet extremely beautiful as it opens a new door offering growth, opportunities, lessons and happiness.
I still do have time
to finish what I have been pursuing
right from the start.
So, why shouldn’t I spend it trying
with my whole head and heart?
You are more to me
a child than a mother.
You are like a baby.
I am the bud and you are my budder.
If you resolve,
nothing is unachievable.
When you choose to evolve,
you attract the unbelievable.
I am in a fright towards who I was in the past. Everyone and everything could affect me. I used to cry silently. I was bullied and laughed at by all the people of my age in the primary and secondary classes without any fault of mine. This experience transformed me into a premature person. Hence, now I can also connect, reciprocate and communicate with the ones who understand the patterns of life.
You are like the sun and my life is like the Earth. It revolves around you. As soon as I decide to go away from you, your sincere efforts hold me back. I feel that this time I will pull so far away from you that all the strings that bind me to you will break. I will walk away from you and will miss you a lot in my life later. But that will only happen when I am able to break the strings attached to you which I am not able to.
Forget and forgive
yourself for all of your errors.
Take a breath of relief.
Ward off all of your terror.
Perseverance and existence are co-related. Perseverance or deterrence—what to follow? What do you gain if you follow them and what do you lose if you don’t? Which one is more important for our existence as an individual?
Yet again, I woke up to the repititive, terrible dream of my family dieing and me witnessing their death helplessly. Though, psychologically, it represents not the actual death but our perspective or emotions towards us and is a part of our subconscious mind, yet it shakes my conscious mind terribly.