I can’t tell you why
I crave so much to die.
So, please let me lie
in your lap and cry.
I do not understand
why do people condemn
the idea of reaching the end
of pain and worthlessness with death.
The people who confront
and show fake concern
on my expression
are the ones
who have inflicted hurt,
doubt and self-worth
in me since my birth
and now when I am growing up,
there is a sudden
change in their behavioral pattern.
I am unable to trust
that they won’t hurt me in the future.
I can’t trust that they will stay good forever.
I have seen the good turn bad.
I am also observing
how the bad has turned evil.
Maybe, they are not the problem.
Maybe, I am the issue.
Nevertheless, I want this cycle to
cut off any more troubles, confusion or pain.
Though it is a kind of uncertainty
but sometimes, death seems beautiful to me.
I can’t think or explain
about how to perennially get rid of my pain.