I am not the kind of girl who would marry a man to carry the tradition forward. I would rather live alone my whole life than to get married for its sake. I truly feel completed in myself and if ever I marry, it will surely be out of choice and not duty. It will be to share out of my cup while refilling it myself. It will be a non co-dependent association and if not, it will not exist in the first place.
I should feel a mysterious, never-ending pull towards the person I will marry. There must be adventure and fun along with a lot of learning. We must not be wedded by custom but by our souls first. Custom will only solidify the soul connection. I will not be locked in a custom to wed nor will I seal certain aspects of myself because of marriage.
There is no pure unconditional love lest there would have been no expectations and hurt. I have taken my own vows towards whoever I will seek to marry, if ever. Marriage is never a bondage or burden and must not feel so.
I am trying to seek what I truly desire and the process will take time. I am trying to learn to seek nothing out of any bond if it is not written so on the papers. I am trying to seek that non-judgmental, non-seeking aspect of mine but if the relation, of any kind, will generate expectations in me, I may leave. Expectations hurt and I don’t think I can bear any more hurt.