I am not Miriam, 

for her religion prevents her

from physical proximity.

I am an atheist

scared of intimacy.

 

She can pour out her heart

in her conversations with Paul

and can dedicate, in this sense,

to him her all.

 

She doesn’t say much 

and merely agrees with her lover.

I don’t have any such

problems in our conversation.

 

I can’t express the deepest emotions

and have to control my physical expression

from breaking out completely

because then, my beloved will become my addiction.

 

I know my family 

and their over-concern about society 

is what prevents me

from seeking his physical proximity.

 

Sex is despised in this country 

due to society’s obsession with virginity

and it’s unnecessary association with girl’s character

which prevents me from being his lover.

 

I am not Miriam.

I am me

and have to deal with frustration 

of denying desired proximity

to the man I love.

 

I Am Not Miriam

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