I smile

and think of smiling further

but something holds me back.

I know for sure,

something is bothering me from inside.


There is some pain

or some chaos

but this is certain, 

that there resides something unresolved

which hasn’t yet come on the surface, 

due to which I have lost the curve on my face.


I wear my headphones 

and start listening to Music

to understand or altogether avoid

this chaos

that resides within my unconscious.


The pain doesn’t leave forever.

I just can’t feel it in those moments

when I deliberately

keep my mind busy 

to avoid the confrontation of my pain.


I smile while feeling pain inside me. 

I am not yet completely healed.

There is still something left

to be identified,

discussed and resolved in me.


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Lost Curve

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