Parents. They do exchange with you. They say that do good and cast it into the river but do they follow that? No. They creepily watch over your deeds and interestingly, they have a team who keeps a watch over their game of toxicity to support them lest they lack to spread it at some point of time.

 

All those proverbs and one-liners which say that parents are the givers are said by the people who hold toxic mentality. Parents are not selfless. They keep a record of all that they do for their child—in cash and kind—so as to seek all of it back to them and if the child chooses individualism as a lifestyle, the child is a ‘spoilt brat’ and his or her parents start wondering that where did they go wrong in the upbringing of their child that he chose to stay away from their toxic pattern.

Interestingly, they teach toxicity too. Not all parents are like this but in my family, most of them are, and who are not are thought to not be ‘so good parents’ as they should have been because they are risking their child to go ‘out of their control’. It sounds like dictatorship, doesn’t it?

Tolerating narcissism, toxicity and disrespect is considered manners in family. No wonder one cannot identify some narcissist outsider when one has been taught the same as ‘ideal behavior’ and ‘showing respect to others’. What is ‘ideal’ is not revolted against since it doesn’t need change, isn’t it so?

People like me who don’t conform to these societal groups and treat those with respect who treat others as same and are people who stay alike in behavior for everyone except if someone has purposely treated them badly, who cannot say bad about someone one second and converse to them smiling at their face the next are considered to be ‘weak’, ‘docile’, ‘immature’ and likewise. Even choosing to stay away from toxicity is something one has to pay for. Family discards egalitarian behavior or more so, mocks it because that is the only answer toxic patriarchy has to egalitarianism. Since this pattern won’t change, I don’t have a choice but to stay alone and on my way for at least next ten years when the society might progress in the pattern of their thoughts.

Selfless Parenting?

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