People say that it is complicated to impress women because no one can decipher what they want. The universe gives what you clearly state out to it (and work towards). So, I am telling you what I, as a woman and a lover, would want in my partner.


I want a man who is as into me as I am into him. He should like to evolve with me. We will learn and grow together. He should not be perfect or obsessed with perfection but love the chaos because if he can truly love the chaos and the cherish the changing weather, he will truly love me and cherish my fluctuating moods and behavior. He should be ready to witness, understand, enjoy and love all versions of me.

I want a man who would put as much efforts to sustain and keep the relationship new, entertaining and exciting as I would. He should be ready to try novel and at times, seemingly dangerous but adventurous activities to keep the fun going.

We should be a team who support each other in all the right decisions, guide when we are going wrong and uplift our moral and make us believe in ourselves in the times of hardships.

He should believe in long-term commitments and happy married life because I don’t believe, neither am I ever going to believe, on short-term on seemingly fragile commitments like live-in or open relationships or likewise.

I want a partner when I start earning a good amount of money and when I do, I want a partner who earns equal to me so that nobody’s self-respect is compromised with and both of us feel truly equal to each other. He should also believe in saving money while enjoying its fruits.

I want a man who doesn’t smoke or drink, even occasionally. To some of you, it may seem as a really high demand but it is a must for me. I just cannot say and bring your focus enough on the fact that I really hate any kind of smoke or habit of alcohol consumption. It automatically makes any person, man or woman, highly unattractive and intolerable to me. I do have addictions, too, but of different kinds. I am addicted to pursuing my goals, my passions, to stand up against the wrong, trying to correct whatever is wrong in however big or small way, trying to help those in need (who I can at that time) and to achieve my highest good. Since they do more good than harm (no harm), I am not going to leave these habits. If he wishes to practice these healthy addictions with me, he will be wholeheartedly welcomed.

I want a partner who does not mock me for the purpose of abusing. I don’t want any abuser or a narcissist. I don’t want a partner who makes promises but who fulfills unsaid promises. Even if we mock each other, it will be to only have a hearty laugh and not to look down upon each other. He should be serious at the times when he needs to be and should be able to provide me safety (physical, emotional or any other) whenever I need that.

He should appreciate my efforts. We should be able to have the comfort level to touch each other’s souls. We should be able to communicate even when afar. As I won’t focus on any man except him, he should not invest in any other woman as he will invest his time, effort and love on me.

He should not settle for less just because achieving something or gaining my love seems difficult. He should be such that what he is inside, he portrays outside. He should be the apple of my family’s eye. He should be willing to at least try, if not really, to pass all the tests that me and my family makes him go through. If he wishes to, he can test me as well. (Well, I don’t really think I would test him because I don’t believe in doubting.)

He should be able to find happiness in the smallest of things and should be able to celebrate it. For me, sitting under the night sky on the beach on the cold sand, hearing the sound of the waves and zoning out from the world is a perfect celebration. I find joy in a sight of a smiling child, a voice of a chirping birds or the sight of the gushing waves of the water. I love roaming barefoot in my parents’ house and on the sand near a water body. For me, all of these are greater than celebrating in a party. I love peace and solace. He should be able to embrace all of these and my tranquility.

He should pursue his passion and motivate me to pursue my own. Only then can we match. He should never count what sacrifices he had to make because of me. I want a marriage, not a favor. He should live in the moment and make the best of today. He should not ask me to lower my standards rather match up to them. The readers may say that he is imaginary and that I have become egotist but these needs are to be met. They can’t be compromised with. I don’t mind staying single and focusing on my own growth if I don’t meet such a man ever. What I know is, when you are clear about what you believe in and then work for it, everything around you modifies to make it work.

Guide To My Heart

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