I understand. I understand that you loved her but she loved none yet fooled all to believe so. You thought she was yours just like you were hers. When you found out it wasn’t so, that when she said she loved you she didn’t mean it, you were broken. She broke your trust, your heart. She broke you.
She committed a sin. But stop for a while. Take your time— a day, a month, a year, a decade or maybe more. Take as much time as you want but heal. Heal before you commit your love again to someone.
Don’t hate all the she’s. Think a bit. Stop hating yourself for loving a person who was unworthy of it. Realise and cherish your ability to love. Find yourself again. Find love in yourself.
Because if you don’t, you might lose someone who you deserve and who deserves your love. You might treat someone— another she who loves you as you loved her— the way she treated you. Don’t pass on something you didn’t like to someone who only loves you. Don’t make her regret loving you because of the hurt you might inflict on her to release your emotional outburst that inculcated from the hurt that the previous she inflicted on you before. The new she is a lamb. Don’t be a wolf in her life. Don’t make another you.
I understand that you are hurt, that you are not innately afraid and resistant to commitment but have turned so because she failed your love and commitment. But turn the table around. Put on my shoes. Don’t project her hurt on me. Don’t hurt my feelings. I have already been holding on to my faith that good men still exist despite all the odds that men have made me go through. I have all the reasons to hate the male gender but choose not to. I am fighting daily struggle of my belief on men and it gets harder every day. I choose to stay strong. You too, try to do so. I understand what made you who you are and I hope that you too, would understand why I am as I am.