They cheat, you are hurt. They apologize but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. It hurts because it breaks and when something breaks, it hurts. It hurts because you have to detach a part of you and maybe, bid it a final goodbye. A part of you dies but the remaining survives. When someone tries to, intentionally or unintentionally, reignite that dead passion, it hurts because as Amy Denver told Sethe, ‘Anything dead coming back to life hurts.’
The person who inflicts the hurt of their past onto you is an unresolved, coward person who is escaping and would keep doing failed attempts to escape from the hurt and himself or herself throughout his or her whole life. What you have to be careful about is that along with the hurt they inflict on you, you don’t accept the negative feelings attached with it. Keep the insecurity, distrust, scepticism at bay. Create a shield around yourself to prevent them from reaching you.
But hurt is not just to forget, considering it to be a nightmare. Every hurt comes with both positive and negative lessons attached to it. The negative lessons are to ignore, be careful of and not to implement. The positive ones— they are the lessons you churn out and conclude from the person who hurt you and the relationship you shared with them.
They taught you hatred, ignore that. Instead, observe and learn the ways to love someone. Through them, realise and cherish the love you hold within yourself to share. The ways in which you can make the special person in your life feel worthy and loved. This doesn’t mean that you still love the partners of your past because they are indirectly teaching you something. This means you have overcome the phase where they held the capacity to hurt you. No longer do they affect you now. Observe, learn, implement, grow over the hurt and conquer the negativity in your life.