Something draws me closer
to you, and it becomes stranger
for me to acknowledge this fact
as I haven’t even met you yet.
I don’t know if it’s your
innocent and enchanting curve
on your lips that spreads happiness
to all who are present around you,
or the truth that you practice
not only in mind but spirit too.
Maybe, it’s all in my mind.
The images up there
and your stature real
might not coincide.
So I hold myself back time and again,
cautioning myself from further hurt;
Reminding myself— like before,
all of it is fake and reverse.
So, I presume you are fake
and keep your contact at bay,
far away from where my eyes can see
and you, right now a fantasy,
go back in my pate
until I see one of your updates
about the happenings of your day.
And then I start thinking
about the one-sided decisions I did take
regarding my feelings,
all of which towards you were directed.
I don’t want to trust you
but all those doubts make me feel guilty
that I hold regarding your personality
I don’t know why this happens
but whenever it does, it stirs within me
anonymous, and disturbs my psyche.
But then, I also want to
for once, at least, meet you.
Be it fake as fantasy
or I might be hit hard by reality
about how my feelings towards you
fooled me to believe something closer
than it was in real, but at least I would be clear
about what to feel— to throb or rest
or maybe cherish meeting for forever
the simplest yet the best.